Aug 27 2008
Mourn No More
My aunt’s husband died last week. The funeral was Monday. I attempted to call her on Saturday and was faced with the usual gatekeepers that work to keep the mourner from dealing with the day to day tasks that can be overwhelming at such a time. I was actually relieved when I was told that she was unavailable.
I find myself at a loss in terms of finding the correct words to say that will provide comfort. Let’s face it, there is really nothing that can be said. We live, we love, and eventually we lose. As I think about what separates those that are able to successfully handle the loss, I realize it is one’s faith in a higher power.
I spoke with my aunt today and struggled to find words of comfort, only to find myself comforted by her instead. Typically, that is what happens when you are not particularly close to the person you are trying to comfort. As you stumble for words, trying to avoid giving the usual platitudes, you find yourself tumbling and are only saved when the mourner releases you from your perceived responsibility to be a source of comfort.
Please don’t get me wrong, I love my aunt. We just never were very close. So as much as I may want to be her anchor in this storm, I know that I am not. I take comfort in knowing that her faith in God will see her through this time. . . .
