Mar 07 2009
Get a job . . .or get out!
I kicked my niece out this week. She has been living with me for the past year and held a job for probably three to four months total during that time. I invited her to live with me and my boyfriend because she graduated high school and was having no success in finding a job in our home town. This is during a time when the whispers of recession were beginning (note we had been in one for at least a year, but the whispers were just starting). I was certain that I could help to focus her and get her started down the path to her future.
In the beginning, things went well. She found a job and then she found two. However,she was let go from the first staffing agency assignment when the project ended. She worked at Old Navy for the holiday season, but after the holiday rush, she was let go there as well. After these disappointments she lost focus, got into a relationship, and has barely looked for anything more.
She says she wants to work, but she is not looking hard enough . . . .especially now with so many people out of work. Looking for a job requires a disciplined focus that I cannot get her to fully understand. I gave her 30 days to either find a job or show proof of aggressively searching for work. If she was not able to meet these requirements, I would be forced to put her out.
Thirty days came due this week and she had no job. She has been staying with a friend for the last month. I suspect because she wanted to adjust to no longer living in my home and because she wanted the freedom of having overnight company (which I prohibited while she remained unemployed). I asked her (via text) to provide the proof of job search and she responded by letting me know she would be coming by to pick up all of her stuff.
I am torn. Did I do the right thing? How can I make her see how important it is to get her life started now?
She sounds a lot like my brother. He’s been out of work since the end of summer and has done very little to find another job. We were sharing a house that we rented from family, but his savings ran out and he couldn’t come up with his share of the bills. I got fed up with covering his half of everything while he just sat around the house and did nothing to contribute. I finally moved into my boyfriend’s house and told my brother he was on his own. I felt bad about it at first. But he still has done pretty much nothing to find work. My parents have been paying his bills for him, which I told them is a bad idea because he’ll never learn that way! Maybe he’ll never grow up and get focused, who knows? All I do know is, I am glad to be out from under the financial strain of providing for someone who was totally taking advantage!
~ Rhonda
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